Just don't punch me in the face if I gave one of your favorite movies a bad review. That'd be bad for business.
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MARVEL TWO-IN-ONE
ANNUAL # 7
I remember reading this as a kid and thinking at the time that this was the coolest comic - ever! I read a friend's copy, and then awhile later I wasn't friends with him any more and I forgot all about the comic. I forgot the name of the series and never really bothered to look for it in the comic bins. Finally, last year, I saw it on Ebay, and seeing the cover brought back all of those memories, not just about the comic itself, but mostly about my old friend and some of the reasons we're not friends anymore.....anyway, that's a whole other story, not suited for this blog....maybe more suited for a therapy session...
Anyway, about the comic.........of course I bought it from Ebay, and then later in the year I picked up another copy at the Comic Con here in Winnipeg. I would be happy to own at least 10 copies of this issue. It's just that good. All you really need to do is look at the cover, and if you're a Marvel Comics fan, you'll instantly recognize just exactly how bitchin' this is. All of the strongest superheroes in one book - Thing, Hulk, Thor, Sasquatch, Colossus, Sub-Mariner, Wonder Man....they're all there. The story involves the Champion, an ultra powerful Elder of the Universe who travels the universe to fight and defeat all of the strongest beings on every planet he comes to. Long story short, he basically kidnaps all of the abovementioned heroes and fights them all one-on-one in the boxing ring, and whoops all of their asses (except Namor the Sub-Mariner who is disqualified before he makes it into the ring). Of course, being his comic book, the Thing is the last to fight the Champion after the rest have been either pummled silly or disqualified. Of course he gets schooled too (the Champion is just that tough), but he's somehow able to take such a terrible beating and keep getting up for more. The Champ is impressed, so he stops the fight and gives a speech about the 'indomitable will of earthmen'. Then he lets everyone go and takes off.
The storyline is pretty simplistic and more than a little ridiculous, but this Annual is pretty indicative of the type of stuff you see in the regular series of Marvel Two-in-One. Unlike it's far superior parent series Fantastic Four, it's not about the story - it's about the Thing punching stuff. He-teams up with other heroes (who usually provide whatever shred of a storyline there is), and they all punch stuff together.
I like it. It's one of those all-star ' who's the toughest superhero' comics. Wicked awesome.
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RED WOLF # 3
About 90% of the comics I own are superhero comics. So sue me. I like to read other stuff too, but I just like the idea of super powers and saving the world and junk. There's a lot of good stuff in the remaining 10% too; Horror, Comedy, Mystery, Fanatsy, Western....
Red Wolf is kind of a hybrid Western/Superhero thing from the early Bronze Age of comics. A little weird, but better than a lot of other Westerns because it's told from the Native American point of view - albeit a somewhat inaccurate depiction of Native life.
This is the only issue of Red Wolf that I have, so I can't tell you a lot about the character or the series. I bought this one mostly for the cover. I wanted to see the filthy white rapists get their comeuppance and get torn to shreds by those wolves....
To be quite honest, the story is pretty much like every other Marvel western and the art is good but not exactly dazzling either. Still, it's a good read for the genre, and at least it's not full of panels of the good guy shooting the guns out of the outlaws' hands...
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Waylan Smithers - The Simpsons
World of Springfield
Hasbro
You all know him. We all know his secret. We've all seen his Monty Burns screen saver ("Smithers....you....really...know how to...turn...me...on..."). We know that, even though he's the right hand man of the most evil and powerful man in Springfield, he's still a pretty good and decent guy.
His action figure is not exceptional, but Mr. Burns wouldn't be complete without him.
Speaking of.....
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Montgomery Burns - The Simpsons
World of Springfield
Hasbro
Superman has Lex Luthor. The Fantastic Four has Dr. Doom. What the Simpsons have got is Mr. Burns. Weirdest thing about all of them is that even though all of these arch-enemies are inherently evil, the heroes always seem to share some bond with the baddies and end up working with them from time to time. Some of the funniest Simpsons gags are when Homer and Burns get together; like when Homer becomes Burns' prank monkey or when they're buried under the avalanche together. Then again, Homer throwing Burns off of the balcony at the power plant a la Darth Vader/Emperor was a good one too.
Burns and Smithers were recently accquired by me. I got them loose with all of the pictured accessories. I especially like the fat stacks of cash that Burns has. These'll work great in action figure photo shoots.
Excellent.
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Planet Hulk (2010)
Pretty simple premise for this story: The Hulk is launched into space by his fellow Avengers for being a threat to humankind. He lands on an alien planet, gets captured and finds himself in a Russell Crow/Gladiator-type scenario. The world is ruled by the tyrannical Red King, and after initially just wanting to be left alone, the Hulk joins the fight to overthrow him, and becomes the new ruler after defeating him. In the comics, the whole Planet Hulk storyline was just part of a larger story arc followed by World War Hulk. Before I go any further, let me just say that I've never read either, so I'm coming at this as a casual fan of the Hulk.
I was a little disappointed with the animation - not that it was bad, but it didn't do proper justice to the otherwise epic feel of the story. You might say it looked like a comic book, but sadly it looked more like a comic book from 20 years ago. The visuals were by no means terrible, but I guess I had my expectations inflated by the cover and the impressive title sequence (seems like they poured more manpower and tech into this than the actual movie - there's even a 'Making of the Title Sequence' in the special features on the DVD).
Somewhat predictable and very little new ideas in the story. The only thing that's different about the Hulk in this one is that he seems to be more intelligent and restrained than we're used to seeing in the films, but the Smart Hulk concept has already been used a kajillion times in the comics. Basically, they could have dropped the Thing or even Superman in a similar situation and it would have played out the same.
A little disappointing, but not a complete waste if you're a comic book fan. It was pretty cool to see the Hulk fight with a sword and beat the snot out of some aliens and robots for 90 minutes or so...
Overall, I give it a B-
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Kick - Ass (2010)
Everybody in the world has already reviewed this film...I guess that's a testament to all the controversy surrounding it or just how good of a movie it really is. I knew of the movie before it came out, having read about it at Marvel.com. The story sounded good, and I had heard that the comics were awesome, but coming from the people who actually produce it and were planning on making the movie before the comic even came out, well........I was skeptical.
I didn't pay much attention to it by the time it hit theatres, and I noticed it months later on the video store shelves. I wanted to rent it initially, but then (going against my own advice) I read the critics' quotes on the box. Even though these things are always basically lies and half-truths, you can get a sense of who the movie is being marketed to.
One quote said:
"Irreverently Entertaining - USA Today"
OK, so that says it might be a little raunchy and different from other superhero movies. I can swallow that. (As a side note, it seems like every shitty movie in existence still manages to get a few positive words from USA Today. Maybe they're, like, too nice to say that a movie blows dead goats.)
The second quote is the one that got me though:
"One of the most WILDLY ENTERTAINING, crowd pleasing ACTION films since KILL BILL"
- NYC Movie Guru
Red flags goin' up everywhere for me. First off, I hated the 45 minutes or so that I saw of Kill Bill. It's just not for me. Almost without exception, I dislike just about everything Q. Tarantino has done, so please don't drag his irreverent ass into this. The highlighting of the text set me off too. Most people priobably don't read the whole description when they're looking for movies to rent (having most likely already decided when they saw the trailer online or on TV), so they're probably only going to grab those few words that stand out.
"Hmmmm... let's see....irreverently entertaining...wildly entertaining....action....Kill Bill...
Sounds bloody and funny - and entertaining! Let's get it, Honey!"
Are we all such sheep? I hope not, but I must have some sheepishness in me because I eventually took it home, only after my third chance to rent it - I chose Planet Hulk the previous time instead. I'm a superhero/comic book fan (just look at any given blog entry of mine) and the comic source appealed to me. Most comics on the shelves nowadays have to have a solid story (certainly better than screenwriters obviously need), so I figured it would at least have that.
If you've read this far, you might think by now that I didn't like Kick-Ass. Not true. I actually loved it. I just can't get over the way this and every other movie is made and marketed to us these days...
It was quirky and very moving in some parts, and outrageously ridiculous in just the right places. I thought it could have used a bit of a filter on the violence, but since it's seemingly targeted at the Kill Bill audience, I can understand why they made it the way they did. I will not get involved in the discussion about an 11 year-old girl hacking up bad guys and spouting profanity. Make your own decisions. If anything, I was surprised at how the shocking violence of the movie somehow seemed to enhance the realism of the story (but then they blew that away with the jet pack at the end).
I think what I liked most was the humor of the movie. It was pretty funny watching a dumb kid in a wetsuit trying to look like a superhero, and the Kick-Ass/Red Mist quasi-slapfight at the end was a nice contrast to the other hardcore kung fu battle going on in the other room.
Okay, so basically I'm admitting that I was wrong. The quotes, with the exception of the Kill Bill wave, we're right. It was irreverently entertaining. I just hope I can forgive myself this time.
A
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Any questions or comments are welcome! Have a good one!
May the Force be with you...
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